Nap Time ... The Bane of My Existence

I intended to write a birthday tribute to each of my girls about how wonderful they are and how much I love them … but I don’t really feel like writing anything nice because only one of them is taking a nap and that one really needed a nap and a fresh, new sparkly four year old attitude. Nap time has become the bane of my existence. I’ve read the books … we have a routine … yet we still have issues. Nap time is supposed to be my golden three hours of the day. I mean I’ll settle for two, but I’m drawing the line no less than a golden-two-hour nap. And I’m not surrendering to that rotten-power-struggle hour before nap … it has got to go. You ALL need to get in bed and go straight to sleep … you have nothing left to potty … it’s all been tinkled out.

I knew during Spring Break we had a bit of a problem, but by Thursday of Spring Break, I thought I had solved it … I thought wrong. I had figured out if I lay with Livi and Lucy for 10 minutes they will chill and go right to sleep … silly me … that only works during Spring Break, not Summer Break. What was I thinking to have thought it could be that easy? Now they want to talk to me, like we are at a sleep over. Umm no … close your mouth, yours eyes, yours ears … you can keep your nose holes open, but that’s it … close all the holes because you must go to sleep immediately!

I’ve narrowed down the culprit … it’s Livi. I had intended to write about how she was my favorite child … well as of 12:30 pm she has been demoted. Livi, I might find it comical listening to you in the middle of the night on the monitor waking everyone up so y’all can all come sleep in my room together. BUT I do not find it comical that you continuously keep everyone up in the middle of the day. It makes my blood boil … Mom needs a nap because you woke me up in the middle of the night! Livi, I don’t care if you have trouble settling. That’s really not my problem. You need to work on your Executive Functioning skills and problem solve. Your solution is to drift right off to sleep. I don’t need to change your room, your sound machine noise, or read a fifth book. We both know none of those options are going to work; you will still be awake. If you stay quite, I might rock you to sleep while I catch up on The Hills. And worse case scenario, which we both know is practically every day, I’ll shove you in the car to go for a short drive (we NEVER did this for you as a baby, so you are lucky … probably because I considered you my favorite). But quite frankly I don’t have time for that, Friends is leaving Netflix at the end of 2019, and I’m still in season 2.

I’ve decided my only logical choice is to build and paten a vibrating mattress pad that mimics a car sensation, but this will cut into my own personal nap time and Netflix time, so I really need y’all to tell me this has already been invented, and I’ll Amazon it to my house.